By ages twenty-two to twenty-five, young adults are usually beginning to establish more of the life they will carry forward. Education may be ending, work may be becoming more serious, relationships may be deepening and decisions about money, faith, marriage, location and purpose may carry more weight.
These are the Establishing Years. For parents, this season requires a different kind of wisdom. Your child may still need support, but they also need room to build. Parenting becomes less about directing and more about relating, advising and respecting the adult they are becoming.
Work and Purpose Begin to Take Shape
This is often the stage when young adults begin to ask, “What am I building with my life?” Some will settle quickly into a career or business path. Others may change direction several times before finding where they fit.
Parents can help by offering perspective without forcing a particular path. Your child may not choose the profession you imagined, and that does not automatically mean they are making the wrong choice.
Encourage diligence, integrity and patience. Many good things take time to establish.
Proverbs 16:3 reminds us to commit our work to the Lord. A young adult should begin learning to see work not only as a way to earn money, but as part of stewardship, service and purpose.
Financial Independence Should Keep Growing
By this stage, financial responsibility should be becoming more personal.
Young adults need to understand budgeting, saving, giving, debt, rent, transport costs, insurance, investment and the long-term consequences of financial choices.
If you are still helping financially, be clear about what the support is for and whether it is temporary. Help should not quietly become permanent dependence.
Proverbs 21:20 speaks of the wise storing up resources rather than consuming everything they have. These years are an important time to build habits that will affect the next several decades.
Relationships May Become Long-Term Decisions
Relationships often become more serious in the Establishing Years.
Some young adults may begin considering marriage. Others may remain single, date, end relationships or decide they are not yet ready for long-term commitment.
Parents should be available for wise conversation without trying to control the outcome.
You can ask good questions about character, faith, values, responsibility, communication and how the relationship handles conflict.
Amos 3:3 asks whether two can walk together unless they are agreed. Shared direction matters. Attraction is important, but long-term relationships require more than attraction.
Faith Must Carry Adult Responsibility
At this stage, faith should be increasingly self-directed.
Your young adult needs to choose how they will pray, where they will worship, how they will serve and what kind of spiritual community they will build around themselves.
Parents can encourage, but they cannot carry another adult’s walk with God.
Colossians 2:6–7 encourages believers to continue walking in Christ, rooted and built up in Him. The Establishing Years are a good time for faith to move from inherited practice into deliberate conviction.
Boundaries Need to Become Adult Boundaries
Many tensions between parents and young adults happen because the relationship has changed, but the boundaries have not.
A twenty-three-year-old does not need the same level of supervision as a thirteen-year-old.
Parents should resist unnecessary intrusion into finances, friendships, schedules and personal decisions unless invited or genuinely needed.
Respecting adulthood does not mean becoming indifferent. It means recognising that love can remain strong without control.
Romans 12:10 reminds us to honour one another. Honour includes recognising the dignity and responsibility of another adult.
Let Them Build Their Own Life
Parents sometimes struggle when a young adult begins making choices that create distance from the family’s routines.
They may move away, join a different church, spend holidays differently or develop new friendships and traditions.
This can feel like rejection when it may simply be growth.
Genesis 2:24 speaks about leaving and forming a new household. While that verse refers specifically to marriage, the principle of leaving dependence and establishing adult life is important.
Your child needs permission to build a life that is genuinely theirs.
Advice Should Become More Invitational
There is a difference between giving wisdom and taking over.
At this age, advice is usually received better when it is offered with respect.
Instead of immediately telling them what to do, try asking, “Would you like my thoughts?” or “Have you considered another angle?”
That small shift acknowledges adulthood and can keep communication open.
Proverbs 15:22 reminds us that plans benefit from wise counsel. Counsel is valuable, but counsel is not the same as control.
The Foundation Years: Ages 0–2
Discover the key developmental needs of children aged 0–2, including attachment, safety, trust, sensory learning, early language and spiritual nurture. Learn how parents can build a strong foundation through everyday care, connection and faith.
Read More
The Discovery Years: Ages 3–5
Discover the key developmental needs of children aged 3–5 during the Discovery Years. Learn how parents can nurture curiosity, independence, emotional growth, character, responsibility and early faith through simple everyday moments.
Read MoreThe Learning Years: Ages 6–8
Explore the key developmental needs of children aged 6–8 during the Learning Years. Learn how parents can build confidence, responsibility, healthy friendships, character, growing faith and a positive attitude towards learning.
Read MoreThe Identity-Building Years: Ages 9–12
Explore the key developmental needs of children aged 9–12 during the Identity-Building Years. Learn how parents can nurture confidence, wise friendships, growing independence, healthy body awareness, gifts, digital wisdom and a personal faith in God.
Read MoreThe Early Teen Years: Ages 13–15
Explore the key developmental needs of teens aged 13–15 during the Early Teen Years. Learn how parents can guide identity, emotions, friendships, body changes, digital life, decision-making, boundaries and a growing personal faith.
Read MoreThe Launch Preparation Years: Ages 16–18
Explore the key developmental needs of teens aged 16–18 during the Launch Preparation Years. Learn how parents can prepare them for adult responsibility, wise decisions, relationships, money, practical life skills and a faith that can stand on its own.
Read MoreThe Emerging Adult Years: Ages 19–21
Explore the key developmental needs of young adults aged 19–21 during the Emerging Adult Years. Learn how parents can advise and release with wisdom as their children take greater responsibility for money, work, relationships, decisions and personal faith.
Read MoreThe Establishing Years: Ages 22–25
Explore the key developmental needs of young adults aged 22–25 during the Establishing Years. Learn how parents can support career growth, financial responsibility, relationships, adult faith, healthy boundaries and increasing independence without taking over.
Read MoreThe Building Years: Ages 26–30
Explore the key developmental needs of adults aged 26–30 during the Building Years. Learn how parents can relate as adults while supporting career growth, financial maturity, marriage, family life, healthy boundaries, responsibility and lasting faith.
Read MoreSubscribe to join me, let's journey together...
